Unfiltered Thoughts – Insecurities around Traveling Alone.

I want to combine really good content posts with posts like these. Unfiltered thoughts that I’m having about traveling and lifestyle. Here it goes, no filters or overthinking about what to write:

I really believe in doing what I love every day and choose how to live my life. But it’s not always that easy to know what my passion is. My dreams can vary from day-to-day, and sometimes I feel really confused.

Will it be worth it going out into the world alone and finding ways to get around? Or should I wait until I have everything sorted out and a steady online income before I go?

It’s dangerous to be too comfortable. Dangerous for the mind. I don’t want to get stuck in a place that is not the ultimate happy place just to be safe and know that money is coming in every month. Sometimes I hate money and I just want to live in a society without it. Sometimes the thought of running out of money or not having enough holds me back.

I just want to be sure that life will take care of me and that I will always be fine. Some days I know this more than anything, and other days I’m not so sure.

It’s a fine balance of taking risks and have a long-term strategy. I have set goals for myself, which has been awesome. But there is some kind of fear holding me back from going all in and leave my home for something new to achieve those goals.

What I do know is that as soon as I get out of my comfort zone, magic will happen. As true as this is for me, I still have a difficult time seeing it when I’m not doing what I love.

I like my job, it’s fine. But I know I have bigger goals than staying at the restaurant for the rest of my life, and I know it is possible to live off doing what I truly love.

It’s the transition that scares me. I have to rely solely on myself. It takes a lot of effort to take action and start taking baby steps in a completely new direction. It’s really like I have to learn how to walk again so that some day I can run the marathon of life.

Another thing that apparently is showing up a lot is the thought about other people. The people in my life that I love and want to stay close with.

As much as I want to keep my friends, I know that letting some of them go can make me grow more as a person. “You are a reflection of the 5 closest people in your life”. If I want to be a nomad and live from creating amazing content to people like me, I need to find those people. I can’t do that by meeting the same old friends and colleagues every day.

Wow, there are a lot of insecurities flying around creating a black cloud over the sun, but the sun is always there.

I don’t want to sound too negative, but writing down my insecurities helps me move on and see opportunities again.

In only 3 months I will go out on my own. I have to find myself again and remember why I used to see everything as possible and easy. I have to prove to myself and others that I don’t have to go in the same footsteps as everyone around me, but that I can create a life based on my own preferences.

I’m excited, and even though there are a lot of unanswered questions, I have to keep believing that I can accomplish anything! Even if I’m alone in a completely new world.

Love

Tess.

 

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